How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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