Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
and i looked up. we had an audience...
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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