eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
