I'd wear matching sweaters with you
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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