Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
