mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
