But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
high people should be assigned attendants
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize