I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
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