he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
