Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
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