ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
she smelled like a LAN party
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
