The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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