Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
