He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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