so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
