i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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