Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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