some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
i think i have herpe
just one?
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
