It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
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