Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize