whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
