I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
wow bdsm is so cute
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