i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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