called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Randomize
