I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
