Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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