Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize