sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
