glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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