You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
