well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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