Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize