ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!