Texts From Last Night

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  (516): View more from New York

  I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank

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  (516): I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank http://tfl.nu/rnlw
  Replies (22) Good night (845) Bad night (2049)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?

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  (281): So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls? http://tfl.nu/vzcb
  Replies (133) Good night (1179) Bad night (6338)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.

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  (417): This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer. http://tfl.nu/gsk7
  Replies (10) Good night (3541) Bad night (1049)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?

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  (270): How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night? http://tfl.nu/sgi1
  Replies (13) Good night (1080) Bad night (2988)
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  (714): View more from California

  found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.

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  (714): found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good. http://tfl.nu/7tze
  Replies (3) Good night (1055) Bad night (2321)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.

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  (508): All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears. http://tfl.nu/qmop
  Replies (15) Good night (747) Bad night (1348)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did

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  (610): You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did http://tfl.nu/pssp
  Replies (3) Good night (1436) Bad night (464)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?

  (940): View more from Texas

  Is this a story I am going to hate you for?

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  (940): Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes? (940): Is this a story I am going to hate you for? http://tfl.nu/tb13
  Replies (2) Good night (1990) Bad night (578)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.

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  (763): FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth. http://tfl.nu/ynrg
  Replies (2) Good night (1232) Bad night (742)
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  (971): View more from Oregon

  It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.

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  (971): It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth. http://tfl.nu/pavc
  Replies (5) Good night (438) Bad night (843)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard

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  (610): I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard http://tfl.nu/mt5d
  Replies (3) Good night (1368) Bad night (447)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....

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  (720): He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ.... http://tfl.nu/i5f3
  Replies (3) Good night (628) Bad night (905)
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  (510): View more from California

  How do we stop her downward spiral?

  (1-510): View more from California

  Wine. For us.

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  (510): How do we stop her downward spiral? (1-510): Wine. For us. http://tfl.nu/x3co
  Replies (6) Good night (686) Bad night (394)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.

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  (720): I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys. http://tfl.nu/mqj0
  Replies (0) Good night (310) Bad night (357)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.

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  (937): Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch. http://tfl.nu/zwlz
  Replies (4) Good night (470) Bad night (181)

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