Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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