pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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