Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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