At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO