He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
29 People Who Do Dirty Things Just To Get Their Way
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.