How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Farmville is her only friend.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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