Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
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