I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
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