I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
