I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
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At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
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I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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