The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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