Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize