no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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