@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
