piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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