The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Randomize
