I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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